To keep it short the reason why some people are ok with authoritarianism is because most structures that we deal with on a daily basis are authoritarian.
Here is evidence that shows a significant amount of people are ok with authoritarianism:
This should be concerning.
And the thing is that it makes sense once you look at what are the most common systems that people interact with the most.
A clear example would be the Boss-Worker relationship. The boss creates a set of objectives/tasks for the worker and the worker sees them out. Rarely does the worker get the chance to set the higher level direction of what they are supposed to be doing with their time leaving them obedient to the boss and their demands.
Another example would be some Parent-Child relationships. Some parents treat their children as people that should show absolute respect towards them just because they are the parents not because they have something that is of value to the child (experience).
Even in the places where we do make democratic decisions those are usually made in ways that are supposed to be supplemental to authoritative decision making. An example would be how we don’t vote on decisions but instead how we vote on others to make decisions for us.
Once you add up all the experiences that someone has throughout their whole life you will see that most of them come into direct contact with authoritarian systems which means it makes that kind of way of thinking familiar and therefore acceptable.
Unlike democracy which is an abstract concept and something we only really experience from time to time.
If we want people to actually stop thinking authoritarianism is ok then we as a society are gonna have to stop using these kinds of systems / ways of thinking in our daily lives.
Another part of it too is that people see all the problems happening in society and in the world, and aren’t getting told how complex they are and why they’re problems in the first place or about some of the nuances. Problems are getting reduced down to “They’re doing this to us,” or “Look how bad this is!” Obvious problems appear to just be languishing while politicians “do nothing about it.” People are just getting worn out by the apparent inaction and circling the drain.
So there’s a certain allure to wanting a strong hand to just come in and fix the thing, a sort of social bystander effect that you’re alluding to. Just seeing all the Russian sympathizers and obviously corrupt politicians in Congress makes me wish there’d be an authoritarian counter-coup that would take all them down in one fell swoop, a declared state of emergency, because finally then we could start making progress on important issues. I doubt I’m alone in thinking a version of this, certainly the Right-wing has been plotting its own coup for years.